My Brothers and
Sisters in Christ,
I spoke to many of you and promised you this pastoral letter
as an update regarding my own Spiritual Journey and what is happening in my
life. I am fully immersed in my Prison Ministry and it has taken on so many new dimensions. I am still preparing to accept the
position at Concord MCI with much anticipation. The only piece that needs to
fall into place now is the funding for the position that takes awhile because
of the financial situation of the state (2 to three months). In the interim, my
hours have increased at the Nashua Street Jail and I truly believe this is
where God wants me to be.
The Christmas Season has slowed everything down to a crawl,
especially regarding my new Home Parish Assignment, but I feel that in the next
few weeks more solid information will be forthcoming. Truthfully, I am in now
hurry. I have taken this opportunity to acquire a new spiritual director and to
concentrate on my family where I feel I have taken for granted for some time
now.
I do have a wonderful story that I do want to share with you
and one that really hits close to home. It has really impacted my prison
ministry, my relationship with my family, and my faith. It is necessary to tell
it in the third person but, at the same time, those closest to me will not find
it hard to understand who am I am talking about:
It is a story about a 16 year old girl named Renee. The
youngest of six children, she has always been known as a “fighter” and one who
isn't afraid to speak out or step up to get what she wants. She has always had
a very charismatic and outgoing personality which has attracted people to her.
She has always been very popular and outgoing. She has never been lacking in
the “friends department” and has been known to be active, especially in sports.
At a younger age, she could be classified as a “Tom Boy” and has broken many of
the sex barriers with sports including competing in boys soccer and baseball;
keeping up and surpassing the stronger sex.
About three years ago, something happened to Renee which was
horrifying to any parent. During an innocent snowball fight between a group of
twelve kids, a random snowball hit a house. The owner, a 48 year old man
charged out of the house and focused on the first person he saw: Renee. He then
proceeded to assault this girl by punching her, strangling her, and dragging
her across the ground. The event was so shocking that traffic stopped and
people got out of their cars to implore this man to stop. Finally, he did.
Charges were filed but the damage to the girl was done. She described that this
was the only time in her short life that she was truly in fear of dying.
The next day, the man's children seeking revenge for the
charges files, sought assistance from a 19 year old man to attack Renee with a
police baton and another assault ensued.
This initiated three years of a personal hell for Renee and
her parents. There was a personality change that was baffling. “Daddy's Little
Peanut” became someone no one knew
anymore. She became a fighter where she didn't start a confrontation but
finished it. Someone would call her a name and she would return a barrage of
insults and derogatory insults which would make a drunken sailor blush. If
someone would push her, she would unleash a barrage of physical retaliation
that would cause someone to think she was a professional boxer. Everything
would be immediately brought to the extreme. There was also a rejection of
established institutions such as school, church, and authority in general.
Soon, Renee established a reputation with the school system
and the police department. They viewed here in a very negative manner. At the
same time, there were glimmers of hope which masked the true diagnosis of what
was happening. In the eighth grade, Renee discovered basketball and a mentor
who was the coach. She excelled in the sport where she was being recruited
early on by high-school coaches throughout the city where she lived. Yet, when
she was off the basketball court, trouble always ensued. There appeared to be a
tug o' war between doing what was right and her instincts for survival and
being safe.
An incident happened over the summer before high school
where her and her brother were accused of throwing rocks at a police car, which
they did not. Her brother, an honor roll student, was assaulted by a police
office along with Renee. This caused a situation where the father had to meet
with the Deputy Chief of Police and possibly bring forward a civil suite.
Changes against the children were dropped but Renee continued her behavior of
acting out and fighting.
The High School Years brought about a series of fights and
situation that, with hindsight, could be linked to that initial assault by the
48 year old and the actions of the police department. It became an ongoing
cycle where Renee would seek the approval of adults and utterly reject
authority when she felt threatened. Her parents defended her, advocated for
her, and fought for her without the full understanding what she was going
through.
Finally, this past Thanksgiving, everything came to a
climax. On Thanksgiving Eve (Wed Night), Renee was arrested in her own home for
assault and battery and held without bail in a Youth Detention Facility. Every
parents' nightmare became true: their child was gone. Renee spent the next 23
days in Dorchester Massachusetts at a detention facility as she went through
the system. Renee's father and mother fought to bring her home but to no avail:
the intent was to hold her for 60 days.
The facility was an alternative facility which concentrated
on positive reinforcement and therapy. It was here that Renee was diagnosed
with PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder). She started receiving treatment and
the parents brought in an outside team to help. Renee flourished in the environment
and was termed, “The best detainee that we ever had.” The juvenile court
realized the situation and gave Renee the break that she needed: all charges
were continued and she was to receive treatment.” Renee was home for Christmas.
An emotional moment was when a church group went into the
facility as asked what the children wanted to pray about. Renee, who rejected
the church for years, stood up and came forward: She said she wanted to pray to
God to help her go home.
Renee is now getting the treatment that she needs and a
group of adults that believe in her. She is looking for a fresh start in a new
school and playing basketball again.
Another emotional moment was when the judge looked at her
and said, “I do not know why I am doing this but I am continuing all charges
against you. You have your fresh start. You can go home.” She immediately burst
into tears and ran to her parents yelling, “I love you!”
Renee's journey to recovery has just begun. It will be a
hard road forward but one that is necessary.
Prayers are definitely answered. Saint Jude, the Patron
Saint of Hopeless Causes (the Prisoners' Saint) truly does intercede. And,
above all, Our God is a Loving God.
This story sums up why God has called me to be a Prison
Chaplain. There are thousands of untold stories out there such as this.
Be thankful for Christ in your lives and thank you for all
of your prayers.
-Deacon Tom.
