I was honored
to be a part of two different celebrations this week. One was very
unexpected while the other one required much planning and
consideration. I received a phone call from a husband and wife who
experienced a tragic loss eight months ago. Their eldest son who was
seventeen years old died in a car crash and their younger one was
severely injured. Because of the condition of their younger son,
there wasn't really any time to mourn and now they had decided to
bury his ashes and have a memorial at their house. To plan this
memorial, they opened their house to me and invited me over to
dinner. What I experienced was most unexpected and strengthened my
own faith and love in Jesus Christ.
When I sat down
at table with the husband and wife, my heart immediately went out to
them. They shared intimate family moments with me about their sons
and their family. The father, who was an engineer, said he had faith
but did not go to church regularly. Before the accident, he explained
that he oftentimes questioned the existence of God and regularly
spent time study the religions of the world. It had become a hobby of
his. He saw religion as a part of the human condition and cultures
that developed over time. The family had a comfortable life and
insured that their children lacked for nothing. There was a good
relationship with the grandparents and everyone within the family
felt that their life was perfect.
Then tragedy
struck. Their oldest son was taken from them and their youngest
suffered from a severe brain injury. Their life appeared to be
shattered. The family was devastated. I cried along with the parents
as they told me the details of the story and how the accident
affected them all. Me being a parent and envisioning one of my own
children be taken from me caused me me to relate with this family
tremendously. Having them actually share with me these personal
feelings and stories drew me closer to them. The presence of God's
Love could be felt in the room.
The husband
then started to explain to me how the accident transformed his faith.
He told me that a tragedy such as this might of easily made him hate
God or believe that there was no God. But instead, he said that he
definitely believes that there is a God and that God loves him, his
family, and most particularly his son. He said that he knew without a
doubt that his son was with God and was happy. He now realizes the
most important things in his life and he wants to explore his
relationship with God deeper. The wife feels the same way. She talks
to her son every day and knows that he is with them all and watches
over them.
I performed the
committal this week and the memorial at their home where their were
over 100 people in attendance. There were stories, tears, and
laughter as everyone shared embarrassing moments and memories. I
thanked the family profusely for welcoming to their home and allowing
me to participate in such a beautiful event. The family was a
demonstration of Jesus Christ working in the world today. Through so
much pain and sadness there was also a profound joy and a realization
that love of children, family, and friends were the most important
things in life. It became a demonstration of God's eternal love for
us. The entire interaction over those past few days strengthened my
own faith and love. It also made me realize all the more how
important God was to me.
After the
memorial service, I needed to rush to a restaurant for my daughter's
wedding shower. This was an event that my wife was preparing for over
a period of several months. To me, it was a big headache and a
financial disaster. I felt that I did not realize the importance of
it until that day after the memorial service. It taught me that
whatever I do in this life, whatever achievements I think I have
accomplished, the love and celebrations that families and friends
have together are the most important things because they become an
expression of love and hope. Watching my family laugh, sing, and
dance lifted all the heavy burdens that I tended to weigh down on
myself.
I felt a great
love for my family and I was so proud of all of them. I felt guilty
for taking them all for granted and I felt bad for the times when I
maybe let them all down. I am not a perfect husband or father, this I
know, yet it was times like these that God tended to remind all of us
of the truly important things in life. It is truly all about love.
Nothing can ever replace the love we have for our families, friends,
and God. If there was no love then whatever is done would be
fruitless.
There is a
challenge before all of us that we must realize. In our lives we all
have the capacity of love and realize the importance of love. If we
ignore it, than our relationship with God will never be complete. If
we take love for granted, then we cannot fully enjoy God's Creation
and our place in it. It takes genuine acts of love and charity to
express and enjoy our faith. With love, everything else will fall
into place. Without it, we would be lost.
Deacon Tom
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